My entire life (up to now), I’ve held my feelings close to my chest. Mainly for fear of judgement and criticism. Then my marriage started to dissolve. My husband and I grew further and further apart and rather than find some mutual ground to save our marriage he decided to seek solace elsewhere.
A few years back, I came across a book by Jenny Lawson. With great humour she tells of her life with depression and anxiety. Some of my friends hated the book – it was a bookclub choice. For me, it was an aha moment. Holy crap I am not as weird or unusual as I thought I was. I can’t explain how amazing it was to find out that I was not alone. I love reading Jenny’s blog – http://thebloggess.com/
More about my struggle with anxiety and depression another day.
Anyway, when my marriage collapsed I decided not to crawl into a cave, but to reach out to everyone around me. Current friends, family (well some of them anyway), acquaintances, and even friends I hadn’t talked to in ages.
It was amazing.
People genuinely wanted to help. To offer support and give advice. Granted, the amount of advice reminded me of being pregnant – I got A LOT of advice, some certifiably weird. Many friends shared their stories – all of which ended with success and the fact that their lives are a lot better now. Sure, there is a struggle, but things get better.
Things get better! You can leave an unhappy marriage.
You/I deserve to be loved!